The Spectrum of Intelligence, and Hard Work

If we are the median of what we do, could it be said that there are certain aspects of our lives where we are behind the median? Often, our ego dictates our confidence in our abilities, and the underlying belief we have for our abilities is that our abilities are better than the average person, and more so for the abilities which we had prior experience in. The notion where we perceive ourselves with an inherent ability to be above average is essentially human nature and it is perfectly normal for us to have faith in our unrealised potential.

On the other hand, there is a certain subset of the population who are insecure and believes that they will never have what it takes to be in the upper echelon of whatever they do. And this belief predominantly stems from their negative past experiences where they struggled to keep up with the incessant rat race contrived by society and ultimately left discouraged. As such, they perceive themselves pessimistically and has the convoluted notion that they will never experience success in life, ascribing to their lack of intellect to be successful. They also settle for mediocrity because they genuinely believe that they will never be able to achieve beyond that, and anything that comes along the way which challenges the paradigm is entirely a new ballgame for them altogether.

During my formative years, I honestly struggled academically, and despite all the qualities that the people around me claim that I possess, my academic performance. were an indictment of my intellect. In fact, coming to terms that perhaps I was not ‘smart’ at all was tough. After all, who would want to think of themselves poorly?

Concepts, theories, and syntaxes do not come to me intuitively, and what others take to learn in an hour, at times could take me double or even triple the duration to that of an average person. For the longest time, I refrained from doing anything which questioned my self-worth. As a result, I became extremely averse to learning new concepts mainly because it seemed to be an insurmountable task and I couldn’t lower my ego to wrap my mind around the incontrovertible truth that perhaps I am really in the lower end of the intelligence spectrum in the population.

I don’t need luck though, I don’t want it, I’ve always had to struggle and fight and that’s made me strong, it’s made me who I am. – Zuko, Avatar.

After decades of dissonance, I admit that I am slower compared to my peers, and if I have to take a longer time to learn, so what? I the grandest scheme of things, what matters to me is the faith in my ability to better myself, and be the person whom I aspire to be one day.

And long as I am conscious, I’ll grit, I’ll grind, and I’ll fight for my aspirations.